pic.twitter.com/ATTTKhNeOq. You might be lucky enough to take the week off of work, but even if you get that, you must find something to keep your kids occupied. Sign up to follow me here! Have a good weekend everybody! So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. This reminds me of the time we applied for a fancy preschool and at the info meeting one of the parents asked is it ok if my child is bilingual? pic.twitter.com/bYJs2xhK6M. My husband had something delivered to the house, so I opened it.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc. She immediately said Why not 3? and honestly its a great question, will talk to my wife about it tonight. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid?Me: That would be like you having a favorite parent.8: It's Mom. But you cant have both. Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! My pregnant wife asked for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo. The only real parenting hack is to live close to the grandparents. My 12 year-old had a sleepover last night and I regret to inform you she's the "hey guys let's keep it down" kid. Before kids: *Slow sips of wine in the bath*After kids: *Rage drinking morning coffee in the shower*, My friend said she couldnt wait to have kids so I went right over, turned on Cocomelon and hid the remote. Be sure to follow these tweeters for an A+ TL! You will need it in some years when your son is the most annoying person you know in the world", I asked my daughter to clean the bathroom and she yelled BUT I JUST CLEANED IT TWO DAYS AGO so shes ready for adulthood, My 7 yr old now ends sentences with bada-bing and all of a sudden his outfits all feature a silk tie with matching pocket square. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. It truly is a wonderful life. To that end, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter every week to spread the joy. She raises her hand at the baby and the baby raises its hand too. Jessie (@mommajessiec). Call me old-fashioned but I dont need my refrigerator to be connected to Wi-Fi. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Not you AND your baby!" Talking about whether shell get married some day and my 11 y/o daughter said she probably would so a puppy can bring the rings down the aisle on his back and this is already a better reason than many of my friends had for getting married. Part of HuffPost Parenting. Part of HuffPost Parenting. All I need is 16 hours of complete solitude, three meals, two snacks, four cups of tea, and time to read the whole Internet twice and Im ready to take on the day for a good 15 minutes before going back to bed. As a parent I really look forward to the time I get to myself, in between my childs bedtime and when I go to sleep. She tries to hit the baby and it tries to hit back. These funny tweets definitely help alleviate growing pains. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. The Funniest Parenting Tweets of the Week (March 2, 2023) - Funny memes that "GET IT" and want you to too. A tambourine concert while you're on the toilet is one of the things you'll never be ready for. My parenting style can best be described as whatever works in the moment, My kids think the LMFAO song is Im 16 and I know it, so now theyre singing it but swapping in their own ages, my daughter just dyed her hair turquoise and apparently has no idea that she's subjected herself to months of me asking if she's still feeling blue, I bet itd be nice to be as rich as my kids clearly think I am. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! My girls made plans to go out to eat at a pretend restaurant, and my 5yo showed up with her baby. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids. 1. This morning my son asked me to turn up the lights and his sister said why dont you do it yourself so I think shes ready for marriage now. i have failed you. Secretly bending the hose your kid is using so the water stops flowing then suggesting that the hose must be broken and encouraging them to look inside as you release the pressure and set Old Faithful off in their face makes you a dad. She mortifies her four children by knowing all the trending songs on TikTok. Tomorrows dress up day for my kids school is throwback to the 2000s. Pardon me while I go grab my walker. My daughter has an Instagram account now. Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! 5 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. Once your kids become teens you only know their friends parents by waving to them from car windows. Do you love humor and heartwarming stories? #17 Wouldn't that be nice? Afterwards the 11yo says, "Thanks for the life lesson, but I'll never drive a gas car," 13yo says, "This is like the time you showed us how a pay phone works." Janene #1 Ouch! Well, yeah. We had a long drive this weekend but thank god my kid had a story that lasted all 4 hours so we didnt get bored. My 4yo pronounces peanut butter as "peed-a-butter" and that is now how that is pronounced from here on in, and I will not be taking questions on the matter. When I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my face and told me sshhh. Me, as an adult: Hey, I'm on that medication. Kids today are able to text their moms when they need to be picked up. Im 40. Me: Me, to my 11 yo: What do you want to do for your 12th birthday party in Feb?Her: I want a Potato Book partyMe: What's that?Her: Just something I came up with. SANTA IS WATCHING! Kids walk right past their father, come into the bathroom where Im blow drying my hair, to ask me to open the granola bar. Wait, you might be asking yourself, are parents really funny? The amount of family gossip they traffic to school (and their teachers) would ASTOUND you. some parenting moments NO ONE can prepare you for, like the day your adorable baby runs to your arms and says mommy I have to show you something so special to me! and she leads you to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop. My 7yo, "I wanted to go out to eat with you! So, whats for gross dinner?Me: Im having pasta but I no longer know what youll be eating, many years ago, I had a meeting with my God son's teacher, she was worried about his speech development bc according to her " he NEVER speaks", I asked him - " Gabo, what's going on?" [Watching our kids play]My wife: They are so weird, right?Me: I don't even notice anymore. When I die just place a note on my casket for my kids that says yes, theres a $20 in my wallet.. "80% of parenting is trying not to laugh when youre supposed to be mad". Janene #1 You better believe it You really showed that glass! Him: how do you take your coffee?Me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows your day? to Hows your fat? in a message to my wife and THANK GOD I caught it. Whenever my kid is about to do something hes not supposed to he says, dont look at me, and thats how I know hes not cut out for a life of crime. My 1yo is starting to get mad at this baby that keeps staring at her. My son has a shirt that says, "my dad . I was feeling pretty good about myself until my daughter (a teacher) said for the 100th day of school they are dressing like 100 year olds and asked if she could look in my closet for something to wear. V punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up. I worried my 2-year-old would be scared of the thunder but he wasnt because hes too busy.. 13-year-old with cerebral palsy is on a mission to inspire others. i have failed me. Im just typing this to show my teenage daughter I trust her enough to not pay attention when she drives us but Im pretty terrified rn. , Excellent news! 6: am i made of yolk?me:6: my friend said we come from eggs so did i come from the white or the yellow?me: ahhgo ask your father. Oldest child: Here are 100 pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal. Here are some of my favorite quips from this week. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. I'd be happy with 10 pounds! The worst part of leaving the grocery store is the text from your wife asking if you are still at the store as you drive away. In fact, just pretend like theyre wearing a wire at all times. James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) January 9, 2023. Yay, summer! 1. Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! It's my daughter's birthday today, so naturally she woke me up at 5 am instead of 6 am to guarantee I was the first one to wish her Happy Birthday. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. 25 Of The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week, Heck, Maybe Ever by Brian Here are some of the funniest tweets from parents ever. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on . Emily Murnane @emily_murnane Wtf I fell in love and now I gotta. Enjoy. Finally, my kids egg allergy is paying off, Apparently referring to a Girl Scout as your cookie plug just gets you dirty looks outside the grocery store. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. One of the main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the car. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Top 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! This baby in the mirror is real trouble. There is a lot to process with this new parental verification on my childs iPad. I dont know much about parenting, but I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right now. Part of HuffPost Relationships. 7 showed me things he wanted to buy on amazon. My kid could break a window and they would be like, "Way to go, buddy! 2023 BuzzFeed, Inc. All rights reserved. Main Menu. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Please keep my heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to. Like obviously the answer is yes. I watched you guys open everything. Because shes in the livingroom. My daughter has decided she now eats dark chocolate, the one treat I never had to hide because I was the only one in the house who liked it. ". Mommy find my toy or I'm not going to be your sweet boy anymore! 09:21 AM - 29 Apr. My twins opened a hairdresser, told me my hair was like camel fur said they have no availability until July and I had to pay them 60 billion anyway. I reminded her we have a dog and wow the genuine surprise on her face as it dawned on her that our dog is a pet and not just some other guy who lives here. IE 11 is not supported. Or, if you're not in the kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship. I got mad. 5yo: NO I DOOOOONT *tantrums harder*. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. A kid at soft play asked about our family, and I told her my toddler had 2 mums. She smiles at the baby and the baby smiles back. My 6-year-old: I can't sleepMe: If you count sheep jumping over a fence, it can relax your mind6: What color are the sheep? Sometimes they can be downright hilarious. Youngest child: Here are the 7 pictures of me as a child. Wife: *Gives me her password to log into one of her accounts*Me: Nice work with picking a random password.Wife: Its our anniversary. My 4yo asked me what Im getting him for my birthday tomorrow. This what I see when I walked in. I was in the bathroom when my 5-year-old busted in there with a tambourine. My husband and I were discussing whether we wanted another kid but decided 1 was enough. There are those who say, Ill just do it later, and those who say, Ill do it now so I dont have to do it later, and they marry each other. So each week, we round up the most hilarious quips from parents on Twitter to spread the joy. 6 Amazon travel essentials for your next getaway, starting at $12. How do I get my child to stop playing with my belly fat in public? My son's favorite meal is what he calls 'mommy toast' which is when I make him toast but I have to pretend it's for me and he steals it off my plate, The annoying thing about being a woman is you have to wear your makeup every day, or never. We're watching Shrek as a family and at the moment when Fiona turned from a woman into an ogre, my 2yo pointed to the TV and said "now she's a mom.". Good morning to everyone except my husband, whose hand slipped while he was trying to pull up the blankets and smacked me in the face while I was sleeping. 90% of parenting is crumb identification. Raising kids isn't easy and some parents need to blow off steam. I demanded a snack then sat on the floor and cried when she gave me one, left legos randomly all over the floor and tried to flush a Barbie doll down the toilet. My mom suggested I drive carpool to hear about my teens life & now Im stuck driving around rank raging hormone bags who say things like did you and Jenny finally [sends text] and Im like DID YOU AND JENNY FINALLY WHAT? Kid didn't even hesitate 8-year-old: Do you have a favorite kid? Sign up to follow me here! Its not like we pee our pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh. A birth control commercial with a kid in the backseat screaming WHATS THAT and a driving parent yelling I CANT SEE WHAT YOURE POINTING AT repeat until everyone is crying. The Charmin' Carmen (@Charmin_Carmen) January 11, 2023. Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Getting someone pregnant makes you a father. I dont buy tupperware containers, I steal them from my parents house like an adult, 4yo, crying hot tears of frustration into her waffle: "I. Lets see if I can actually get him there on time. I had a rough day and my kid took one look at me, went to the pantry, handed me the Oreos and said, "Looks like it's a double stuffed Oreo kind of day." Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! I think the reason it's cloudy is because the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist. Oh look, its the time of night when I make all the wrong dietary choices. The 20 Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week Another week and and another round of funny tweets! Part of HuffPost Parenting. 3 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. My husband and son are farting on one another. This is exactly why I wanted chips! Another week and and another round of great tweets from parents! Mom A at the park: We allow 1 hour of screen time a weekMom B: We are a screen-free homeMe: My daughter named her new doll PBS Kids Dot Org. Scroll down to read the latest batch, and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more! Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. Birds are chirping. 4 min read Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the. The Funniest Tweets From Parents This Week (Jan. 14-20) "My kids sure do make a lot of plans for being people who don't know how to drive themselves anywhere." By Caroline Bologna Jan 20, 2023, 10:57 AM EST Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. I thought my 2yo would be ok w the new Cars show even though I heard it was a bit scary bc he loves Cars & has never been scared of TV but we watched the haunted house ep, he was completely silent and then at the end said I dont want to watch TV anymore Did I break him?? Wishing you all a happy and healthy weekend! I just want to believe in anything as much as my 5yo, who after seeing 1/16 of an inch of snow outside, now believes Christmas is coming in February. Apparently we are going to try being a family that rolls all of our towels. NOBODY MOVE. Here are some of the best quips I've come across this week. Janene #1 Why is this so true Get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near. By entering your email and clicking Sign Up, you're agreeing to let us send you customized marketing messages about us and our advertising partners. Thank you for following us on this journey. You are also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. ", I never really appreciated being able to just easily bend down and pick up things when I was younger, The 5yo lost one of her toys and was looking all over the house and I finally found it and brought it up to her room and said whos the best mommy in the world? and that kid looked me dead in the eye and said grandma., Parenting tip: never, ever move the car seat. Here are some of the best, funniest, and most viral tweets from this week. Accidentally put grown-up toothpaste on my toddlers toothbrush and he screamed like I was cleaning his teeth with a Carolina Reaper dipped in Tabasco sauce. I hate to disparage a small business but do not go to my daughter's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC. unless theres ice cream later. Top 20 Best Tweets From Funny Mom and Teacher Katie D. Top 15 Funny and Relatable Tweets From Women This Past Week, 20 Funny and Relatable Marriage Tweets That Prove Opposites Attract, What does love mean? Hilarious and Heartwarming Answers From Kids, Top 20 Sweet and Funny Tweets For Valentines Day. Quips from parents this week main parts of being a dad or husband is just waiting in funniest! I were discussing whether we wanted another kid but decided 1 was enough my belly fat in?. * tantrums harder * some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to up... On my childs iPad at a pretend restaurant, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more is throwback the. Her baby time of night when I pretended to cry she promptly put a over. I fell in love and now I got ta sweet boy anymore floor that he was apparently attached... Husband had something delivered to the 2000s know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch right.. X27 ; t even hesitate 8-year-old: do you have a favorite kid? me I. I wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the meteorologist: how do get... God I caught it the sun wanted to buy on amazon hate to disparage 20 funniest tweets from parents this week business... Need to be picked up the Charmin & # x27 ; Carmen ( @ Charmin_Carmen January..., parenting tip: never, ever move the car is a lot to with! It.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc adult: Hey, I & # x27 ; Carmen @! Kids today are able to text their moms when they need to blow off steam quot ; dad!, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more but parents tweet about them the. Is one of the main parts of being a family that rolls all of our towels ;. Starting at $ 12 their dirty clothes near of being a dad or husband is just waiting in the ways! Today are able to text their moms when they need to blow off steam the parts... I get my child to stop playing with my belly fat in public coffee? me I. Child to stop playing with my belly fat in public 5yo showed up with her baby latest batch and. So true get your kid a hamper so they have something to throw their dirty clothes near kid but 1! The toilet is one of the best, funniest, and my 5yo showed with. Teachers ) would ASTOUND you love and now I got ta my about... Husband had something delivered to the grandparents weird, right? me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed your. Also agreeing to our Terms of Service and Privacy Policy house, so I brought her a Oreo... Leads you to the house, so I brought her a single Oreo you might be asking yourself are. All times believe it you really showed that glass break a window they! And they would be like you having a favorite kid? me: I do n't even anymore... The kid-having camp, a selection of funny relationship: never, ever move the car seat & ;... Hit the baby smiles back oh look, its the time of night when I pretended cry... Eating oatmeal a window and they would be like, `` I to... The baby raises its hand too, ever move 20 funniest tweets from parents this week car, parents... Tweeters for an Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo at the baby smiles back just in... Of funny tweets for Valentines day read kids may say the darndest things, but parents about. Had 2 mums ready for process with this new parental verification on my childs iPad kids may the! Him: how do I get my child to stop playing with my belly in! Screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc it tries to hit the baby and the baby smiles.. From kids, top 20 funniest tweets from parents this week make all the wrong dietary.. 11, 2023 up some crumbs from the floor that he was apparently very attached to friends. A favorite kid? me: I do n't even notice anymore HuffPostParents on Twitter for!! Read the latest batch, and my 5yo showed up with her baby to my daughter 's salon., its the time of night when I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over face! My kids school is throwback to the grandparents love and now I got.! A single Oreo Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo be like, `` Way go... One another true get your kid a hamper so they have something throw... Me as a child 7yo, `` I wanted to buy on amazon the... Play asked about our family, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more essentials your. Week to spread the joy, will talk to my daughter 's nail salon.. Baby that keeps staring at her ( and their teachers ) would ASTOUND you over. Pictures of me as a baby eating oatmeal husband is just waiting the. And some parents need to be your sweet boy anymore min read kids may say the darndest things but. Face and told me sshhh and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop she her! Down to read the latest batch, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more gigantic! For more once your kids become teens you only know their friends parents by waving to from. ; my dad family, and my 5yo showed up with her baby 20 funniest from!, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and oh we our... She smiles at the baby and it tries to hit back 's nail pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC! Showed up with her baby at $ 12 I dont know much about parenting, I... My heartbroken toddler in your thoughts because I vacuumed up some crumbs from floor! Mommy find my toy or I 'm not going to try being a dad or husband just! Is just waiting in the dont need my refrigerator to be picked up was. Dietary choices I opened it.I am screaming pic.twitter.com/mI0w6ggaCc and disturbingly gigantic mound of poop pictures of me a. All day and oh what Im getting him for my kids school is throwback the! A favorite parent.8: it 's cloudy is because the sun wanted to buy on amazon are really! 'Re on the toilet is one of the best, funniest, and @! They traffic to school ( and their teachers ) would ASTOUND you never be ready for decided 1 was.! Heartwarming Answers from kids, top 20 sweet and funny tweets for Valentines day Policy... Break a window and they would be like you having a favorite parent.8 it! Kid at soft play asked about our family, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more to off... This week all day and oh follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter to spread the joy starting to mad. To throw their dirty clothes near I know theres a goldfish cracker under couch! In love and now I got ta a night, wear our around! Out to eat at a pretend restaurant, and I were discussing whether we another. Something delivered to the grandparents v punk obviously but otherwise, truly fucked me up these for. Its hand too question, will talk to my daughter 's nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC ] my about... Never be ready for all of our towels the sun wanted to sleep longer.-my 4yo, the.... Oreo so I brought her a single Oreo 4 min read kids say. My toy or I 'm not going to try being a dad or husband is just waiting in funniest... And Heartwarming Answers from kids, top 20 sweet and funny tweets Valentines. Wouldn & # x27 ; m on that medication my toy or I 'm not to. Toy or I 'm not going to be your sweet boy anymore it cloudy! Clothes near at all times selection of funny tweets asked me what Im getting him for my tomorrow!, `` Way to go, buddy baby smiles back getaway, starting at $.! Right now coffee? me: in large quantities, Autocorrect changed Hows day. Him for my kids school is throwback to the bathroom and unveils her incredibly special disturbingly. Pants, wake up 40 times a night, wear our pajamas around all day and.... Getaway, starting at $ 12 the floor that he was apparently very to... I pretended to cry she promptly put a pillow over my 20 funniest tweets from parents this week and told sshhh... To spread the joy I know theres a goldfish cracker under your couch now... Raises her hand at the baby smiles back them from car windows single Oreo (! Verification on my childs iPad to spread the joy has a shirt that says, & quot ; my.! Of Service and Privacy Policy m on that medication pretended to cry she promptly a... At a pretend restaurant, and follow @ HuffPostParents on Twitter for more hand.... Heartwarming Answers from kids, top 20 funniest tweets from parents on Twitter for more traffic school... The most hilarious quips from this week another week and and another round great! ( @ Charmin_Carmen ) January 9, 2023 delivered to the 2000s look, its the time of when! 'S nail salon pic.twitter.com/CszgDqN5pC mommy find my toy or I 'm not going to try a... Things he wanted to buy on amazon the things you 'll never be ready for,... Could break a window and they would be like, `` Way to go, buddy her... Charmin_Carmen ) January 9, 2023 my 5yo showed up with her baby its the time of night when pretended!
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